Always both,
fighting fires inside
and embracing them nevertheless,
they might teach you lessons,
you better learn.
Always both,
the weakness within,
which asks to define you,
find a way to consent to it
and to turn it inside out.
Always both,
the tearing thoughts
that lead you nowhere,
follow their path playfully naively
and show them their dead ends.
Always both,
bathing in suffocating sorrow
for hours and hours,
and swallowing it in one big gulp,
that’s how you drop the weapon.
Always both,
hurt and bliss,
pain and pleasure,
laughs and tears,
beginnings and endings,
futures and pasts,
sunrises and sundowners,
and you can be all of them.
You can melt.
You can choose.
Soak yourself in contrasts,
contradict yourself,
switch forth and back,
back and forth,
keep going,
drive them mad,
as long as you know,
which side is yours,
yours truly.
xxj